Homeless in DC - Conclusion - REDUX
J wrote this recap of the week's events:
______________________________________
Well, it has been a few days since I've regained my home-living status. Just wanted to thank everyone who came out Saturday night to welcome me back into society. I really don't think I've ever tasted a better beer than the first one I tasted that night. It was great to talk to everybody--especially after a week of talking to mainly myself, inanimate objects, and other homeless guys.
To give a general idea--it wasn't that bad--kind of like a camping trip with one very important difference, I had no idea where I would sleep every night, and when I was there, I rarely if ever slept soundly for fear of something happening to me. Usually I was able to sleep some during the day, but it never really made up for the uneven lack of secure sleep at night. My stomping grounds covered about half the city--it ranged from roughly the Capitol to west of Georgetown toward the borders with MD/Virginia, and up north toward American U. and points north of the zoo on Connecticut. Sadly I never made it to such places as Anacostia or NE near RFK. Oh well, perhaps next time.
A couple of things--every time it rained it sucked. Second, I shouldn't have brought white T-shirts and a blanket with white in it; often times I didn't want people to know I was crashing somewhere, and I was way too visible. And although the Pokemon backpack was funny; it really made me look like a possible perv when I was hanging around playgrounds--and it made alot of the people in places such as Dupont think I was perhaps a desperate individual with the mind of a child, which made me a popular target indeed. Had some interesting moments in this regard.
I can't write forever--but a quick day by day recap:
Sunday night: Dave dropped me off where I requested, in the rich neighborhoods west in Georgetown off Foxhall road. Slept in a field at the Hope School for about four hours before birds woke me up. When it got light I saw a swingset in a park--thought I might come back and utilize it later.
Monday: Slept on the mall for a couple hours after a good walk from past Georgetown in between the Capitol and the monument. Went to the natural history museum when I got up. Then slowly made my way to near Dupont for my daily Arabic class 530-8. Nothing really eventful happened, but I was really nervous because I wanted to find a place to sleep, but didnt know where to go and didnt really want to walk all the way back to past Georgetown. While walking through Foggy Bottom it started to downpour. SO I ducked into a classroom building at GW, with a freshman orientation group. Listened for about a half hour to their inane get to know each other games, where they were from, etc. and drank some Jack in plain view of them.
Then I wondered if I could get upstairs to the classrooms, which I could. Picked out a dark classroom on the second floor, and thought I was golden. Even had a view of a sorority house where lots of girls were plainly visible watching TV, getting ready for bed, etc. Not gonna lie to you, left a nice present on the desk while enjoying my surroundings before bed, if you know what I mean. Then curled up on the floor for what I thought was a comfortable sleep....
Not to be. Janitor kicked me out an hour later. Then a night of complete suckiness ensued, where I slowly made my way sleeping on various park benches from the kennedy center to near the white house, shivering cold and damp because although it wasn't raining, everything was wet from earlier, and it was actually fairly cold (low 60's, and I was in shorts with a thin blanket). I found it curious that although many cops of various sorts saw me sleeping on benches, and presumably saw that I wasn't your average looking homeless guy, they never bothered me.
Tuesday: Eventually went to the mall around 6am to sleep, slept pretty well 7-10, but it was still wet and cold early, and it got too hot quick. Just crappy day, and spent a bunch of my meager money on a potbelly sub, so figured I better do some begging to replenish my money.
So I made a sign and went to Dupont before my class that said "temporarily homeless and not all that bright: please help." Made like 5 bucks, and got some change from my classmates when it came time for class. Seeing their reactions as they slowly figured out I was really doing this and not joking was priceless--and the look on my teachers' face when he found out what I was doing--priceless. Plus I would always get to class first, and the first student there would sit as far away as possible until there were no more seats left. But the late students would have no choice but to breathe in my pungent smell of bugspray and sunscreen and body odor. Ha-ha.
That night found a good place to sleep--right by memorial bridge on a concrete bench--no one walks over memorial bridge at night or stops in the traffic circle by the Lincoln there, so I felt pretty safe. Nice night.
Wednesday: Not much happened. Went to Dupont after class to eat dinner. A large african american older gentleman took an interest in me and wondered if I was camping. I told him no--he kept bothering me. After awhile I politely excused myself to go eat my dinner in a place a little away from Dupont. Then I walked all the way to the swingset past Georgetown to sleep. Good night, smoked a cigar, drank most of my Jack. Slept pretty well.
Thursday: Walked my ASS off. 6 in the morning uphill up Foxhall to American U. Over to Connecticut near the MD border. Then down Connecticut to the zoo. That was cool. Saw one of the pandas decimate a bamboo tree for breakfast, and as mentioned, a zookeeper had left some carrots and lettuce unguarded which was destined for the monkey cage. That was my unexpected breakfast.
I was really tired by 12 and slept in Dupont roughly 12-3 waiting for my class. After class decided to look for a new place to sleep because I really wanted to do as little walking as possible, by this time the week was taking its toll and the miles and miles of walking were starting to have an effect. So I found a place to sleep at the Office of Personnel Management in Foggy Bottom on a bench.
That night around 1200 one of the funnier things of the week happened. Some drunk college students charged through the bushes without seeing me en route to drunken urination on the building, woke me and absolutely scared the piss out of me. I grabbed my pepper spray and sat up and scared one of them, leveling it about a foot from his face. Didn't shoot thankfully, as I'm sure I would have become persona non grata with the cops almost immediately I'm sure, but as one of their buddies still was urinating and the rest back in their car, one yelled "Hey, derelik my balls," at me, a quote from zoolander. I laughed (it was hilarious in the quiet city), but told the guy still urinating that they probably should have waited till he was in the car to yell stuff. He agreed. Hilarious, but maybe one of those things where you had to have been there.
Friday was the 4th. The rain made that night hard as well. The fireworks were great, and they occurred during a lull in the rain--I made it onto the mall for that. But spent a good time before and after the event taking shelter under building overhangs. Got kicked out of many, as there were extra security guards around for the 4th. Had no idea where to sleep, but eventually slept at my memorial bridge hangout roughly 1230-430, until it started raining again. At that point I decided to just walk up to my classroom at Johns Hopkins and sleep outside under its overhang.
Funny part about that is I was there for all of 15 minutes asleep when I was woken up, BY THE SAME LARGE GENTLEMAN I INTERACTED WITH ON WEDNESDAY. He was on his bike and asked me if I was okay at first, but then quickly evolved into him asking if I wanted to come to his place. He even was so kind as to get into some details of what would conceivably go on at his place.
Needless to say I politely declined. I would give anything to have seen my face when I saw him peering over my blanket when I woke up. Wow, just wow. Not sure if I accurately captured the humor/horror of this situation fully--but it was quite a moment.
In any case, after he went off on his way, I decided to actually sleep under the building. I burrowed myself in like a giant mole.
That's pretty much the jist, but I could talk for hours about it. Other highlights included my semi-naked bath in a sprinkler outside a building one day. I thought I could sneak into a hotel pool, but one of the things I learned (there were many) is that it is very difficult to do that in DC. In fact some of the hotels I couldnt even operate the elevator without a room key. So I gave up and used a sprinkler. A personal thrill for me is by accident walking into a kenner league basketball summer league game in Georgetown when I didnt know there was one. Air conditioning. Free basketball. Money.
The other main question was, how did I interact with other homeless people. Pretty well is the short of it, although we didn't interact that much. I was amazed at their talent for being unseen (one of my mistakes was being to visible). Several times I'd be in a park or something late at night, and I wouldn't notice a guy until I saw him stand up or heard the flow of his urine stream. As far as my sign and my begging, I was pretty careful not to intrude on anyone's begging corner.
Finally, I want to thank C and Tarvis and wives, and Steve for aid provided and helping to document all this. I also want to thank my new special friend Holly who I met Saturday night--apparently I didn't look all THAT bad by the end of the week.
Thanks for everything--look forward to talking about the week more when I see everybody some more in person....for now I guess I better get back to work.
I mean, when you take leave to go homeless and then spend most of the morning writing about it on your company's dime---
Oh well, f### them.
_______________________
oh and stay tuned, there's supposed to be a story about J on the news tonight. I'll post video if I can.
______________________________________
Well, it has been a few days since I've regained my home-living status. Just wanted to thank everyone who came out Saturday night to welcome me back into society. I really don't think I've ever tasted a better beer than the first one I tasted that night. It was great to talk to everybody--especially after a week of talking to mainly myself, inanimate objects, and other homeless guys.
To give a general idea--it wasn't that bad--kind of like a camping trip with one very important difference, I had no idea where I would sleep every night, and when I was there, I rarely if ever slept soundly for fear of something happening to me. Usually I was able to sleep some during the day, but it never really made up for the uneven lack of secure sleep at night. My stomping grounds covered about half the city--it ranged from roughly the Capitol to west of Georgetown toward the borders with MD/Virginia, and up north toward American U. and points north of the zoo on Connecticut. Sadly I never made it to such places as Anacostia or NE near RFK. Oh well, perhaps next time.
A couple of things--every time it rained it sucked. Second, I shouldn't have brought white T-shirts and a blanket with white in it; often times I didn't want people to know I was crashing somewhere, and I was way too visible. And although the Pokemon backpack was funny; it really made me look like a possible perv when I was hanging around playgrounds--and it made alot of the people in places such as Dupont think I was perhaps a desperate individual with the mind of a child, which made me a popular target indeed. Had some interesting moments in this regard.
I can't write forever--but a quick day by day recap:
Sunday night: Dave dropped me off where I requested, in the rich neighborhoods west in Georgetown off Foxhall road. Slept in a field at the Hope School for about four hours before birds woke me up. When it got light I saw a swingset in a park--thought I might come back and utilize it later.
Monday: Slept on the mall for a couple hours after a good walk from past Georgetown in between the Capitol and the monument. Went to the natural history museum when I got up. Then slowly made my way to near Dupont for my daily Arabic class 530-8. Nothing really eventful happened, but I was really nervous because I wanted to find a place to sleep, but didnt know where to go and didnt really want to walk all the way back to past Georgetown. While walking through Foggy Bottom it started to downpour. SO I ducked into a classroom building at GW, with a freshman orientation group. Listened for about a half hour to their inane get to know each other games, where they were from, etc. and drank some Jack in plain view of them.
Then I wondered if I could get upstairs to the classrooms, which I could. Picked out a dark classroom on the second floor, and thought I was golden. Even had a view of a sorority house where lots of girls were plainly visible watching TV, getting ready for bed, etc. Not gonna lie to you, left a nice present on the desk while enjoying my surroundings before bed, if you know what I mean. Then curled up on the floor for what I thought was a comfortable sleep....
Not to be. Janitor kicked me out an hour later. Then a night of complete suckiness ensued, where I slowly made my way sleeping on various park benches from the kennedy center to near the white house, shivering cold and damp because although it wasn't raining, everything was wet from earlier, and it was actually fairly cold (low 60's, and I was in shorts with a thin blanket). I found it curious that although many cops of various sorts saw me sleeping on benches, and presumably saw that I wasn't your average looking homeless guy, they never bothered me.
Tuesday: Eventually went to the mall around 6am to sleep, slept pretty well 7-10, but it was still wet and cold early, and it got too hot quick. Just crappy day, and spent a bunch of my meager money on a potbelly sub, so figured I better do some begging to replenish my money.
So I made a sign and went to Dupont before my class that said "temporarily homeless and not all that bright: please help." Made like 5 bucks, and got some change from my classmates when it came time for class. Seeing their reactions as they slowly figured out I was really doing this and not joking was priceless--and the look on my teachers' face when he found out what I was doing--priceless. Plus I would always get to class first, and the first student there would sit as far away as possible until there were no more seats left. But the late students would have no choice but to breathe in my pungent smell of bugspray and sunscreen and body odor. Ha-ha.
That night found a good place to sleep--right by memorial bridge on a concrete bench--no one walks over memorial bridge at night or stops in the traffic circle by the Lincoln there, so I felt pretty safe. Nice night.
Wednesday: Not much happened. Went to Dupont after class to eat dinner. A large african american older gentleman took an interest in me and wondered if I was camping. I told him no--he kept bothering me. After awhile I politely excused myself to go eat my dinner in a place a little away from Dupont. Then I walked all the way to the swingset past Georgetown to sleep. Good night, smoked a cigar, drank most of my Jack. Slept pretty well.
Thursday: Walked my ASS off. 6 in the morning uphill up Foxhall to American U. Over to Connecticut near the MD border. Then down Connecticut to the zoo. That was cool. Saw one of the pandas decimate a bamboo tree for breakfast, and as mentioned, a zookeeper had left some carrots and lettuce unguarded which was destined for the monkey cage. That was my unexpected breakfast.
I was really tired by 12 and slept in Dupont roughly 12-3 waiting for my class. After class decided to look for a new place to sleep because I really wanted to do as little walking as possible, by this time the week was taking its toll and the miles and miles of walking were starting to have an effect. So I found a place to sleep at the Office of Personnel Management in Foggy Bottom on a bench.
That night around 1200 one of the funnier things of the week happened. Some drunk college students charged through the bushes without seeing me en route to drunken urination on the building, woke me and absolutely scared the piss out of me. I grabbed my pepper spray and sat up and scared one of them, leveling it about a foot from his face. Didn't shoot thankfully, as I'm sure I would have become persona non grata with the cops almost immediately I'm sure, but as one of their buddies still was urinating and the rest back in their car, one yelled "Hey, derelik my balls," at me, a quote from zoolander. I laughed (it was hilarious in the quiet city), but told the guy still urinating that they probably should have waited till he was in the car to yell stuff. He agreed. Hilarious, but maybe one of those things where you had to have been there.
Friday was the 4th. The rain made that night hard as well. The fireworks were great, and they occurred during a lull in the rain--I made it onto the mall for that. But spent a good time before and after the event taking shelter under building overhangs. Got kicked out of many, as there were extra security guards around for the 4th. Had no idea where to sleep, but eventually slept at my memorial bridge hangout roughly 1230-430, until it started raining again. At that point I decided to just walk up to my classroom at Johns Hopkins and sleep outside under its overhang.
Funny part about that is I was there for all of 15 minutes asleep when I was woken up, BY THE SAME LARGE GENTLEMAN I INTERACTED WITH ON WEDNESDAY. He was on his bike and asked me if I was okay at first, but then quickly evolved into him asking if I wanted to come to his place. He even was so kind as to get into some details of what would conceivably go on at his place.
Needless to say I politely declined. I would give anything to have seen my face when I saw him peering over my blanket when I woke up. Wow, just wow. Not sure if I accurately captured the humor/horror of this situation fully--but it was quite a moment.
In any case, after he went off on his way, I decided to actually sleep under the building. I burrowed myself in like a giant mole.
That's pretty much the jist, but I could talk for hours about it. Other highlights included my semi-naked bath in a sprinkler outside a building one day. I thought I could sneak into a hotel pool, but one of the things I learned (there were many) is that it is very difficult to do that in DC. In fact some of the hotels I couldnt even operate the elevator without a room key. So I gave up and used a sprinkler. A personal thrill for me is by accident walking into a kenner league basketball summer league game in Georgetown when I didnt know there was one. Air conditioning. Free basketball. Money.
The other main question was, how did I interact with other homeless people. Pretty well is the short of it, although we didn't interact that much. I was amazed at their talent for being unseen (one of my mistakes was being to visible). Several times I'd be in a park or something late at night, and I wouldn't notice a guy until I saw him stand up or heard the flow of his urine stream. As far as my sign and my begging, I was pretty careful not to intrude on anyone's begging corner.
Finally, I want to thank C and Tarvis and wives, and Steve for aid provided and helping to document all this. I also want to thank my new special friend Holly who I met Saturday night--apparently I didn't look all THAT bad by the end of the week.
Thanks for everything--look forward to talking about the week more when I see everybody some more in person....for now I guess I better get back to work.
I mean, when you take leave to go homeless and then spend most of the morning writing about it on your company's dime---
Oh well, f### them.
_______________________
oh and stay tuned, there's supposed to be a story about J on the news tonight. I'll post video if I can.
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